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Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:

$ fortune | cowsay

 _________________________________________
/  Hack placidly amidst the noisy         \
| printers and remember what prizes there |
| may be in Science. As fast as possible  |
| get a good terminal on a good system.   |
| Enter your data clearly but always      |
| encrypt your results. And listen to     |
| others, even the dull and ignorant, for |
| they may be your customers. Avoid loud  |
| and aggressive persons, for they are    |
| sales reps.                             |
|                                         |
| If you compare your outputs with those  |
| of others, you may be surprised, for    |
| always there will be greater and lesser |
| numbers than you have crunched. Keep    |
| others interested in your career, and   |
| try not to fumble; it can be a real     |
| hassle and could change your fortunes   |
| in time.                                |
|                                         |
| Exercise system control in your         |
| experiments, for the world is full of   |
| bugs. But let this not blind you to     |
| what virtue there is; many persons      |
| strive for linearity and everywhere     |
| papers are full of approximations.      |
| Strive for proportionality. Especially, |
| do not faint when it occurs. Neither be |
| cyclical about results; for in the face |
| of all data analysis it is sure to be   |
| noticed.                                |
|                                         |
| Take with a grain of salt the anomalous |
| data points. Gracefully pass them on to |
| the youth at the next desk. Nurture     |
| some mutual funds to shield you in      |
| times of sudden layoffs. But do not     |
| distress yourself with imaginings --    |
| the real bugs are enough to screw you   |
| badly. Murphy's Law runs the Universe   |
| -- and whether or not it is clear to    |
| you, no doubt B*n dS = 0.         |
|                                         |
| Therefore, grab for a piece of the pie, |
| with whatever proposals you can         |
| conceive of to try. With all the        |
| crashed disks, skewed data, and broken  |
| line printers, you can still have a     |
| beautiful secretary. Be linear. Strive  |
| to stay employed.                       |
|                                         |
\ -- Technolorata, "Analog"               /
 -----------------------------------------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||

Here is the PHP code:

$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay");
echo $output;