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Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:

$ fortune | cowsay

 _________________________________________
/  "Emergency!" Sgiggs screamed, ejecting \
| himself from the tub like it was a      |
| burning car. "Dial 'one'! Get room      |
| service! Code red!" Stiggs was on the   |
| phone immediately, ordering more rose   |
| blossoms, because, according to him,    |
| the ones floating in the tub had        |
| suddenly lost their smell. "I demand    |
| smell," he shrilled. "I expecting total |
| uninterrupted smell from these f*cking  |
| roses."                                 |
|                                         |
| Unfortunately, the service captain      |
| didn't realize that the Stiggs          |
| situation involved fifty roses. "What   |
| am I going to do with this?" Stiggs     |
| sneered at the weaseling hotel goon     |
| when he appeared at our door holding a  |
| single flower floating in a brandy      |
| glass. Stiggs's tirade was great. "Do   |
| you see this bathtub? Do you notice any |
| difference between the size of the tub  |
| and the size of that spindly wad of     |
| petals in your hand? I need total bath  |
| coverage. I need a completely solid     |
| layer of roses all around me like       |
| puffing factories of smell, attacking   |
| me with their smell and power-ramming   |
| big stinking concentrations of rose     |
| odor up my nostrils until I'm wasted    |
| with pleasure." It wasn't long before   |
| we got so dissatisfied with this        |
| incompetence that we bolted. -- The     |
| Utterly Monstrous, Mind-Roasting Summer |
| of O.C. and Stiggs,                     |
|                                         |
\ National Lampoon, October 1982          /
 -----------------------------------------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||

Here is the PHP code:

$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay");
echo $output;