Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / Approaching the gates of the \ | monastery, Hakuin found Ken the Zen | | preaching to a group of disciples. | | | | "Words..." Ken orated, "they are but an | | illusory veil obfuscating the absolute | | reality of --" | | | | "Ken!" Hakuin interrupted. "Your fly is | | down!" | | | | Whereupon the Clear Light of | | Illumination exploded upon Ken, and he | | vaporized. | | | | On the way to town, Hakuin was greeted | | by an itinerant monk imbued with the | | spirit of the morning. | | | | "Ah," the monk sighed, a beatific smile | | wrinkling across his cheeks, "Thou art | | That..." | | | | "Ah," Hakuin replied, pointing | | excitedly, "And Thou art Fat!" | | | | Whereupon the Clear Light of | | Illumination exploded upon the monk, | | and he vaporized. | | | | Next, the Governor sought the advice of | | Hakuin, crying: "As our enemies bear | | down upon us, how shall I, with such | | heartless and callow soldiers as I am | | heir to, hope to withstand the | | impending onslaught?" | | | | "US?" snapped Hakuin. | | | | Whereupon the Clear Light of | | Illumination exploded upon the | | Governor, and he vaporized. | | | | Then, a redneck went up to Hakuin and | | vaporized the old Master with his | | shotgun. "Ha! Beat ya' to the | \ punchline, ya' scrawny li'l geek!" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;