Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / To understand this important story, you \ | have to understand how the telephone | | company works. Your telephone is | | connected to a local computer, which is | | in turn connected to a regional | | computer, which is in turn connected to | | a loudspeaker the size of a garbage | | truck on the lawn of Edna A. Bargewater | | of Lawrence, Kan. | | | | Whenever you talk on the phone, your | | local computer listens in. If it | | suspects you're going to discuss an | | intimate topic, it notifies the | | computer above it, which listens in and | | decides whether to alert the one above | | it, until finally, if you really | | humiliate yourself, maybe break down in | | tears and tell your closest friend | | about a sordid incident from your past | | involving a seedy motel, a neighbor's | | spouse, an entire religious order, a | | garden hose and six quarts of tapioca | | pudding, the top computer feeds your | | conversation into Edna's loudspeaker, | | and she and her friends come out on the | | porch to listen and drink gin and laugh | | themselves silly. | | | | -- Dave Barry, "Won't It Be Just Great | \ Owning Our Own Phones?" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;