Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / The Worst Musical Trio \ | | | There are few bad musicians who have a | | chance to give a recital at a famous | | concert hall while still learning the | | rudiments of their instrument. This | | happened about thirty years ago to the | | son of a Rumanian gentleman who was | | owed a personal favour by Georges | | Enesco, the celebrated violinist. | | Enesco agreed to give lessons to the | | son who was quite unhampered by great | | musical talent. | | | | Three years later the boy's father | | insisted that he give a public concert. | | "His aunt said that nobody plays the | | violin better than he does. A cousin | | heard him the other day and screamed | | with enthusiasm." Although Enesco | | feared the consequences, he arranged a | | recital at the Salle Gaveau in Paris. | | However, nobody bought a ticket since | | the soloist was unknown. | | | | "Then you must accompany him on the | | piano," said the boy's father, "and it | | will be a sell out." | | | | Reluctantly, Enesco agreed and it was. | | On the night an excited audience | | gathered. Before the concert began | | Enesco became nervous and asked for | | someone to turn his pages. | | | | In the audience was Alfred Cortot, the | | brilliant pianist, who volunteered and | | made his way to the stage. | | | | The soloist was of uniformly low | | standard and next morning the music | | critic of Le Figaro wrote: "There was a | | strange concert at the Salle Gaveau | | last night. The man whom we adore when | | he plays the violin played the piano. | | Another whom we adore when he plays the | | piano turned the pages. But the man who | | should have turned the pages played the | | violin." | | | | -- Stephen Pile, "The Book of Heroic | \ Failures" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;