Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / Another greeting card category consists \ | of those persons who send out | | photographs of their families every | | year. In the same mail that brought the | | greetings from Marcia and Philip, my | | friend found such a conversation piece. | | "My God, Lida is enormous!" she | | exclaimed. I don't know why women want | | to record each year, for two or three | | hundred people to see, the ravages | | wrought upon them, their mates, and | | their progeny by the artillery of time, | | but between five and seven per cent of | | Christmas cards, at a rough estimate, | | are family groups, and even the most | | charitable recipient studies them for | | little signs of dissolution or | | derangement. Nothing cheers a woman | | more, I am afraid, than the proof that | | another woman is letting herself go, or | | has lost control of her figure, or is | | clearly driving her husband crazy, or | | is obviously drinking more than is good | | for her, or still doesn't know what to | | wear. Middle-aged husbands in such | | photographs are often described as | | looking "young enough to be her son," | | but they don't always escape so easily, | | and a couple opening envelopes in the | | season of mercy and good will sometimes | | handle a male friend or acquaintance | | rather sharply. "Good Lord!" the wife | | will say. "Frank looks like a | | sex-crazed shotgun slayer, doesn't he?" | | "Not to me," the husband may reply. "to | | me he looks more like a Wilkes-Barre | | dentist who is being sought by the | | police in connection with the | | disappearance of a choir singer." | | | \ -- James Thurber, "Merry Christmas" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;