Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / You should tip the waiter $10, minus $2 \ | if he tells you his name, another $2 if | | he claims it will be His Pleasure to | | serve you and another $2 for each | | "special" he describes involving | | confusing terms such as "shallots," and | | $4 if the menu contains the word | | "fixin's." In many restaurants, this | | means the waiter will actually owe you | | money. If you are traveling with a | | child aged six months to three years, | | you should leave an additional amount | | equal to twice the bill to compensate | | for the fact that they will have to | | take the banquette out and burn it | | because the cracks are wedged solid | | with gobbets made of partially chewed | | former restaurant rolls saturated with | | baby spit. | | | | In New York, tip the taxicab driver $40 | | if he does not mention his hemorrhoids. | | | \ -- Dave Barry, "The Stuff of Etiquette" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;