Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / Once there was this conductor see, who \ | had a bass problem. You see, during a | | portion of Beethovan's Ninth Symphony | | in which there are no bass violin | | parts, one of the bassists always | | passed a bottle of scotch around. So, | | to remind himself that the basses | | usually required an extra cue towards | | the end of the symphony, the conductor | | would fasten a piece of string around | | the page of the score before the bass | | cue. As the basses grew more and more | | inebriated, two of them fell asleep. | | The conductor grew quite nervous (he | | was very concerned about the pitch) | | because it was the bottom of the ninth; | | the score was tied and the basses were | \ loaded with two out. / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;