Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / When alerted to an intrusion by \ | tinkling glass or otherwise, 1) Calm | | yourself 2) Identify the intruder 3) If | | hostile, kill him. | | | | Step number 3 is of particular | | importance. If you leave the guy alive | | out of misguided softheartedness, he | | will repay your generosity of spirit by | | suing you for causing his subsequent | | paraplegia and seek to force you to | | support him for the rest of his rotten | | life. In court he will plead that he | | was depressed because society had | | failed him, and that he was looking for | | Mother Teresa for comfort and to offer | | his services to the poor. In that | | lawsuit, you will lose. If, on the | | other hand, you kill him, the most that | | you can expect is that a relative will | | bring a wrongful death action. You will | | have two advantages: first, there be | | only your story; forget Mother Teresa. | | Second, even if you lose, how much | | could the bum's life be worth anyway? A | | Lot less than 50 years worth of | | paralysis. Don't play George Bush and | | Saddam Hussein. Finish the job. | | | | -- G. Gordon Liddy's "Forbes" column on | \ personal security / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;