Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / I. Any body suspended in space will \ | remain in space until made aware of | | | | its situation. | | | | Daffy Duck steps off a cliff, expecting | | further pastureland. He | | | | loiters in midair, soliloquizing | | flippantly, until he chances to | | | | look down. At this point, the familiar | | principle of 32 feet per | | | | second per second takes over. | | | | II. Any body in motion will tend to | | remain in motion until solid matter | | | | intervenes suddenly. | | | | Whether shot from a cannon or in hot | | pursuit on foot, cartoon | | | | characters are so absolute in their | | momentum that only a telephone | | | | pole or an outsize boulder retards | | their forward motion absolutely. | | | | Sir Isaac Newton called this sudden | | termination of motion the | | | | stooge's surcease. III. Any body | | passing through solid matter will leave | | a perforation | | | | conforming to its perimeter. | | | | Also called the silhouette of passage, | | this phenomenon is the | | | | speciality of victims of | | directed-pressure explosions and of | | reckless | | | | cowards who are so eager to escape that | | they exit directly through | | | | the wall of a house, leaving a | | cookie-cutout-perfect hole. The | | | | threat of skunks or matrimony often | | catalyzes this reaction. | | | | -- Esquire, "O'Donnell's Laws of | \ Cartoon Motion", June 1980 / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;