Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:
$ fortune | cowsay _________________________________________ / An excellence-oriented '80s male does \ | not wear a regular watch. He wears a | | Rolex watch, because it weighs nearly | | six pounds and is advertised only in | | excellence-oriented publications such | | as Fortune and Rich Protestant Golfer | | Magazine. The advertisements are | | written in incomplete sentences, which | | is how advertising copywriters denote | | excellence: | | | | "The Rolex Hyperion. An elegant new | | standard in quality excellence and | | discriminating handcraftsmanship. For | | the individual who is truly able to | | discriminate with regard to excellent | | quality standards of crafting things by | | hand. Fabricated of 100 percent | | 24-karat gold. No watch parts or | | anything. Just a great big chunk on | | your wrist. Truly a timeless statement. | | For the individual who is very secure. | | Who doesn't need to be reminded all the | | time that he is very successful. Much | | more successful than the people who | | laughed at him in high school. Because | | of his acne. People who are probably | | nowhere near as successful as he is | | now. Maybe he'll go to his 20th | | reunion, and they'll see his Rolex | | Hyperion. Hahahahahahahahaha." | | | | -- Dave Barry, "In Search of | \ Excellence" / ----------------------------------------- \ ^__^ \ (oo)\_______ (__)\ )\/\ ||----w | || ||
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay"); echo $output;