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Enjoy a randomly generated fortune:


$ fortune | cowsay

 _________________________________________
/ Inadmissible: Not competent to be       \
| considered. Said of certain kinds of    |
| testimony which juries are supposed to  |
| be unfit to be entrusted with, and      |
| which judges, therefore, rule out, even |
| of proceedings before themselves alone. |
| Hearsay evidence is inadmissible        |
| because the person quoted was unsworn   |
| and is not before the court for         |
| examination; yet most momentous         |
| actions, military, political,           |
| commercial and of every other kind, are |
| daily undertaken on hearsay evidence.   |
| There is no religion in the world that  |
| has any other basis than hearsay        |
| evidence. Revelation is hearsay         |
| evidence; that the Scriptures are the   |
| word of God we have only the testimony  |
| of men long dead whose identity is not  |
| clearly established and who are not     |
| known to have been sworn in any sense.  |
| Under the rules of evidence as they now |
| exist in this country, no single        |
| assertion in the Bible has in its       |
| support any evidence admissible in a    |
| court of law...                         |
|                                         |
| But as records of courts of justice are |
| admissible, it can easily be proved     |
| that powerful and malevolent magicians  |
| once existed and were a scourge to      |
| mankind. The evidence (including        |
| confession) upon which certain women    |
| were convicted of witchcraft and        |
| executed was without a flaw; it is      |
| still unimpeachable. The judges'        |
| decisions based on it were sound in     |
| logic and in law. Nothing in any        |
| existing court was ever more thoroughly |
| proved than the charges of witchcraft   |
| and sorcery for which so many suffered  |
| death. If there were no witches, human  |
| testimony and human reason are alike    |
\ destitute of value. --Ambrose Bierce    /
 -----------------------------------------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||


Here is the PHP code:
$output = shell_exec("/usr/games/fortune | /usr/games/cowsay");
echo $output;